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Use a Pre-Marital Counselor
There are many great reasons to prepare for married life with an a few sessions of pre-marital counseling. Advice:Save your marriage before you start it!
Don’t wait until you have problems. They may even start on the honeymoon.
Speaking of honeymoon, have you ever stopped and thought seriously about what a honeymoon entails? Sure there are loads of romantic moments and lots of love and lazing around but do you know what else it means? 24/7 contact with your loved one.
Think about it, here you are with the guy you know well, really well and suddenly there are few distractions around you. It is just him and you – stress. Talk about stress! You may have married him for life but not for 24/7, if you get what I mean. Sure, you can build up to this living in each other’s pockets scenario – round about retirement age seems a good time to take this challenge on. And, believe me, it is a challenge.
You don’t have to wait 30/40 years to find out what it is like to be together 24/7 relentlessly. Just book a honeymoon for a month and see what it’s like.
Do I seem like someone who is talking from experience? I am. I know the bit about the honeymoon thing; retirement is a long way off, thank heavens.
So, here are some great reasons to take a bit of counseling before you say ‘I do’. It will:
- get you communicating better Now by this I don’t mean chatting and cooing at each other; I mean serious conversations about what matters most – you two, and the bond you are about to formalize
- uncover your expectations of life together Don;t assume you know what he expects; don’t even assume you know what to ask about as far as expectations are concerned. you may be surprised to find out how many expectations you have, without even knowing it. And then, there are his hidden assumptions about how life together will pan out
- teach you how to argue constructively There is more to be gained from resolving conflict than avoiding it. Sure your parents have managed to avoid dealing with the big differences in their lives but look where it has got them
- reveal the differences in your backgrounds We all have family history, like it or not. And we all bring to the table, differences and a sense of what is right and wrong and how things should be done. Before getting married, it might be wise to get these differences out in the open and explore how they will hit your relationship
- help you develop goals as a couple You probably have personal goals, even work goals, financial goals, life goals eve. But, do you have couple goals? Mmm?