Keep Love Alive – Find Yourself First!

Keep Love - Find Yourself

Can Reality Match Up to Our Dreams?

Ah… the dream relationship. The fairytale wedding. The happy ever marriage. Do they exist? Or are they only real in our imagination?k

Look at how many lines we were fed as little girls. All those gorgeous dolls, fluffy teddies and fairy tales that whisper bedtime stories of handsome princes and rescuing paramours.

That was a long time ago but the dye has been caste. That image of being rescued is still there but is it relevant today? What’s wrong with dreaming of being rescued by a young gorgeous, modern-day hero wearing an Armani suit and driving a black porsche, you may ask? Nothing is wrong with it, I guess if that is truly what you want.

But I put this to you, do you really know what you want in a man, a relationship, a marriage? I’m guessing that you don’t. How can you when you were brain washed from an early age about fairy tales and dragons in a dark world, and princes on white steeds and being swept off you feet? Is this what you are still looking for today? Think about it, how much do you know about yourself? Do you really know what you like, what you want, and how much you are prepared to give to get, keep and love a man forever?

So many questions. Do you have all the answers? I don’t and that’s why I’m here reading and learning and figuring it out. Sure I’ve been in a committed relationship a long time but there are always good reasons to take a refresher course and check in and see who we are, where we are in life and how we want to spend the next stage.

Find Yourself - Love Yourself

Keep Love – Take a Personal Stocktake

Being in a relationship takes it toll. Let’s face it, a long-term partnership can be both exhausting and exhilarating. To commit, and re-commit day after day takes dedication and focus and love. Sometimes, this takes its toll.

Where are you on the continuum of life?

Are you at the end of one of life’s stages? Perhaps you’re:

Insecure, Stressed and Socially Awkward

  • thinking of having another child
  • leaving your relationship
  • moving
  • returning to the workplace
  • taking time out from your job
  • retraining for a new career
  • saving your marriage or remarrying
  • living with a new partner
  • starting over after the death of you partner
  • saving the world
  • saving yourself
  • saving yourself from the world, or even
  • saving the world from you

I’m exhausted looking at all the potential changes we can make in our life – and we are just one person. How can it be that there be so many opportunities in our 85+ years when we get the chance to say ‘more of the same’ or ‘I’m changing direction now’?

Have you made time for yourself of late? Probably not. Who has enough time these days? Time is one of the scarcest things in our lives, and being women, we tend to put ourselves down the list of priorities.

I’m glad you’re here – that you have read this far. I hope you will continue to read on. Maybe you’ll find what I’m saying strikes a chord with you; maybe you’ll see where I’m coming from; perhaps you’ll get a feeling that what I’m saying does make sense.

Make no mistake I’m not  a raving feminist. As I said above, I’ve been in a committed relationship for a very long time and I’ve hit some of those T junctions above –  the life changing moments – and I’ve come through a stronger person.

This part of my blog is for us. I’m into empowerment for women. I work on the counseling phone lines and I hear too many stories of women who are being abused. They are either beating up on themselves or they are allowing their partners to bully, cajole, bribe, or punish them into making choices that probably aren’t the best for them. That’s not my way and if you feel the same and you are willing to take responsibility for your own learning, your own feeling and your own life then you and I may just be kindred sisters.

My take on all this is that if I am no good for myself then I am definitely no good for anyone else.

If you want to find true love, keep love and grow in love then I reckon the key is to invest time, effort and a little money in yourself – heck – even have your horoscope compatibility chart done. If you don’t, and if you don’t feel you are worth it, then who else will take the time, who else will make the effort to help you do more than live.

Living is the entry point of life.

Living is the bare minimum that we can expect from life.

Thriving is where we need to be.

Are you ready to blossom? Scary isn’t it? That’s good though. Where else are we going to learn, grow and become the best we can be for ourselves, our partners and our families if not on the edge. That is where all learning takes place.

But you won’t be alone because there are millions of other women standing on the edge of change, ready to transform too! This is our dawn; our rebirth; our chance to be even more than we are now. Are you ready to take on the challenge? I hope so.

What Next?

You might like to check out a couple of these pages first:

Elsewhere on the Net

Keeping the Love You Find

Overcoming Shyness and Social Anxiety

How to Keep Love Strong – Yes Magazine